Observations
from my weekly wanderings, usually in Northern Virginia (NOVA).
I was
watching a movie this week, Gettysburg if you must know. It’s an excellent
movie about a horrible day. If you have not seen it, I recommend it, but the
film is not precisely my subject.
There
is a scene near the end, probably rather unremarkable to most, that just – gets
me. I don’t mean puts a lump in my throat and tears in my eyes – there are other
scenes that do that.
No,
this scene is different and I am not confident I will be able to explain how or
why.
Near
the end, the battle over, General Longstreet (Tom Berenger), is sitting by a
campfire, alone, unmoving, just staring – into the fire. Before long he is
joined by General Lee (Martin Sheen), and the moment is over.
I
cannot imagine the misery that Longstreet felt. But he sits calmly staring into
the fire. He’s almost peaceful. And remember, he’s just witnessed close up and
personal one of the bloodiest days in American war history. He just sent
several thousand men to their doom.
But I
love the campfire scene – I think perhaps because I’ve been there – staring into
the fire.
Of
course, I’ve never known anything close to the anguish that Longstreet must
have felt, but I’ve sat alone at a campfire hypnotized by its slow destruction of
the wood, comforted by its warmth, illumined by its light, calmed by its
nocturne. There is something cathartic about it.
It
causes me to wonder, what is it about fire? I’m pretty sure I won’t answer that
to anyone’s satisfaction, but it’s a pleasing mystery to ponder. To have its
full effect, it must be a campfire. A fire in the fireplace has its own charms,
especially if the wind is howling, and the snow or sleet is tapping on the
panes – but this speaks more of comfort and blessing and less of my place in
the universe.
In the
elements; in the wild; and yet a barrier from the wild this powerful gift the
creator gave to man alone. Perhaps the campfire summons the ancestral call, the
forgotten memories coded into my being that recall the fires of long ago when
man was only learning his dominion.
And
now? Now life is hectic, complicated. I am dominated by creation.
Perhaps
I need a good fire.
.